I woke up at 4:30am this morning. For some reason, I could not go back to sleep. So I played Sims instead. Hahaha. Mali.
Anyway, so as usual, I started thinking about things. You know, the little things that make my life "exciting"--NOT.
I realized that I don't care about a certain person anymore. At least not in that way anymore. Yeah I know, you've read this statement prolly a hundred times in this blog, but it's real this time around.
I guess I was just confused. Gusto kong bumalik sa dati kong posisyon sa buhay niya, pero obviously, hindi na pwede mangyari yun. Little by little I'm learning to understand and accept that fact. Ganun naman sa buhay eh, pakonti-konti lang. I'm still affected whenever he doesn't acknowledge me/my presence, but hey, that's life. Hindi tayo forever nasa spotlight. I had my time, but I wasn't able to make the most out of it. So kebs na. Carry on.
I still hate him sometimes though. Mwahaha.
I love what I'm doing. I like my job. I love the people here. It's almost been 4 months since I started working here. Kaso sometimes, parang nakukulangan ako sa ginagawa ko. I don't know if I'm not doing my best, or sadyang ganun lang talaga yung nature ng work ko. Pag busy, super busy talaga. Pero pag chill time, sobrang wala namang ginagawa. I'm trying to explore part time jobs. Kahit nga di ako bayaran eh, just for additional experience. There's just this discontented feeling na hindi ko malaman kung ano ang pinagmulan.
Feelings-wise? Hindi na mabigat yung pakiramdam ko. Na-break na yung ice eh. However, hindi pa rin okay ang lahat. I think may miscommunication na nagaganap sa pagitan namin. Magkaiba siguro ang pagkakaintindi namin sa mga bagay-bagay. Hopefully the "rift" will end soon. I'm tired of not having friends around. Haha. I miss them badly.
Well there's always the positive side: wala masyadong gimik, so wala din masyadong gastos! LOL
Okay lang yun, I'm preparing my wallet and my bank account naman for the upcoming expenses when I move to my new house with Joy, Jem and Carms. Maybe you'll start reading more about them as the year progresses. Malamang, sila makakasama ko sa new house eh.:))
Weytaminet. I haven't told you bout the new house, have I? Well, I'm moving out soon. I'll be trying to live on my own.. with friends, rather. Siguro I'll share details na lang (and prolly a few pictures) when I actually move in.:))
I have so many things to look forward to this month. I want to go to UP Friday Night Lights this Friday pero wala pa akong nahahanap na kasama.:( Parang ang sad naman kung mag-isa ako manonood ng fireworks display diba? Haha. Self-pity!!! Then I have my get-together this Saturday with my elementary and high school batchmates! But I'm more excited to see Jers! Excited lang ako makipagdaldalan hehehe.
There's the CMMA next week. My KBP Accreditation exam on the 24th. And then my DFA appointment (Finally, passport yehey!) on the 27th.
The days are going on too fast to the point na nakaka-overwhelm na yung bilis. I wish I can keep up. Well, I'm able to keep up naman most of the time. Matindi lang ang effect tuwing naiiwan ako. Hehe. Eww, self-pity another!
Keep on fighting, Biancs! Look forward to the good stuff. Good things are yet to come. Sabi nga nila, you won't see the good side if you have no bad side to compare it to. ;)