Up for the challenge!

G!

I am so determined to do this.:)

Hello change, I think I'm ready for you. Make me better.

Bring back the old me. Cheery and positive. No sweat sa mga minor things like that.

Look at the bigger picture. Progressive mindset, hindi yung pang-ngayon lang.

Kaya ko kaya?

No choice kundi kayanin!

G na G!

Dog days are oh-vurr.

I thinking of starting a photo blog especially now that I have my handy baby with me. But then again, I've got gazillions of online accounts already. I don't know.

Maybe I will do that, one of these days.

No, I will not be abandoning this blog, but I will be doing some changes probably. This "grey area" theme brings back so many memories since I revived it a year ago; memories that I don't want to remember for now.

Oh well papel.

Isa pa.

OH WELL PAPEL.

I'm excited for summer. So many plans! Sana matuloy lahat!:3

Ciao!;)

Slowly sinking in.

It's tomorrow!

IT'S TOMORROW!!!

I'm really graduating tomorrow. As in for real na ito. Another chapter of my life is ending. At the same time, another one is beginning. It still feels surreal though. Maybe mas magsisink-in pa siya in the coming days.

My dress is ready. Plans for tomorrow are ready. Cameras are charged. Pero I can't help but feel uneasy. I don't know what to expect for tomorrow. I mean, will it be the last time to see some of the people I've spent my college years with? It's sad, but I'm slowly accepting the truth. We're all bound to move on anyway. Hehe. Wait, this demands another blogpost dedicated to this topic alone. Hahaha. Ganun ka-special yung "college ('til forever)" friends ko. CLINGY? I KNOW.:))

So cheers to the next chapter of our lives! This is just the beginning of an even greater adventure.:)

It's foreign on this side.

Two days ago, my resolution was to consciously stop thinking about "it". A total reversal of what I was doing before. Ngayon, full control na talaga. I think this might just work for me.

Resolution #2: Stop asking myself questions.

Starting with Twitter. Hindi ko na itetextual analysis ang Twitter. Hahaha. (Bistado!)

On the other side of things, I'm beginning to reconsider this "other" thing. Parang I want to focus my attention there... for now. Alam ko this is nothing serious. Maybe a little fun wouldn't hurt me. Maybe it'll do me good pa.

All I know is that this person makes me feel a bit better when he talks to me. Hindi basura ang feeling. Haha.

There's this part of me that wants to rant about feeling like trash, but I'll stop here. Resolution #1 nga naman!:))

The days are getting better.:)

Thinking of who?

May ganito akong drama ngayon in my head. Oh whatever, Bianca.

Owen Wilson.

Matagal pa po ba?

Mejo naaatat na kasi ako. Mejo lang naman po.

Hihi. Thanks in adbans.:)

Haven't you heard pt.2

So he's asking me if I want to go on a road trip with him.

Hmmm.

Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. Not going to over analyze. (REPEAT 'TIL IT WORKS!)

G! Haha.

P.S. Sobrang kaladkarin ko lang talaga.

P.P.S. Sana matuloy 'tong roadtrip na 'to. Di ko alam kung bakit, pero sana matuloy.

If it kills me.

More than what I want (that I can't have), I think the main thing's that been bothering me recently is my anticipation of the upcoming separation anxiety that's going to happen soon.

Yeah, yeah... it hasn't happened yet. But you can't blame me for anticipating it. I have seen it happen before. I'm scared that it'll happen again.

I'm still in this denial phase where in the picture is still pretty. Nothing's going to change. But reality bites hard. I'm starting to feel the world move on. Too bad, the world can't pause at these glorious and epic moments of my life.

I'm scared of being forgotten.

Of being left-behind.

Of being replaced.

Of being worthless.

Of being irrelevant.

I'm seriously scared. I've been emotional for the past few days, mainly because of this. I keep on bumping into quotes about not being happy all the time, not being around the ones that you love most of the time, lahat na. What will happen?

I just pray that this support system of mine will not dismantle. I can't bear to entertain such thoughts. Naiiyak na ako. Oh well, this is life. We all have to go our other ways and meet new people.

Sana wala masyadong magbago. Lalo na yung mga taong I have in mind. I'm scared because some of them are my closest friends. I don't want to experience what I've experienced before (bestfriendship blues). Sana wala talagang iwanan at indiyanan.

Hay nako. The anticipation.

Blabbery (that you might have probably read before)

Sometimes I ask myself, "why?"

But recently, I have been asking myself, "why not?"

Noooo. Wag na nga. Kadiri talaga. Nakakainis. Nakakatawa. La la la... What is this. No. I already know what it is. Sana matigil na ito soon.

Normalcy. Normalcy please. Balik na sa status quo please? Balanced levels.

12345.

I keep staring at the pictures. Hahaha. Yak.

Gone.

Now that my thesis is done and college is almost over, my mind has become less preoccupied. Worse, thoughts of you have come back to my head. Which really sucks, by the way.

This is kind of bad because instead of progressing, I'm regressing... going back to thoughts that I'm not supposed to think about anymore because they will only lead to depression and even lonelier thoughts.

I'm trying to look for traces. I don't know if there are any. I want to find out if there are. But I don't want to end up disappointed. You kept on reappearing on the "memories" part of my facebook page. I didn't want to click the links, but guess what? I ended up clicking them. They took me back to the "easier" times when I was still innocent and wasn't hurting like this.

So I guess I'll stop right here before I bury myself any deeper. Hopefully sleep will be a good remedy for these lonesome thoughts.